come up with our own list of 'Office Party' Do's and Don'ts and some party theme ideas that could at least make for an interesting event.
Enjoy
Things to help you dodge some office party pitfalls:
Do Not bring any Husband, Boyfriend or Friend that was recently let go from the company hosting the party. Awkward moments can happen when the recently let go is tallying up the cost of the shindig and bellows out mid party from the DJ booth; 'for what this sh**ty party cost you could have paid my salary'.
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| Instigator of Drunkenness |
Do Not use Digital Cameras, Mobile Upload Devices, etc. after the meal portion of the party.: Any instrument that can be used for blackmail or extortion is not an accessory you should have on your person. Channel your inner TMZ warrior with more constructive tasks like getting your boss drunk perhaps.
Do bring your 'Pause Button':
The Twix "Need a Minute" commercials are a great visual of situations that illustrate the power of Stop, Assess, Express.
Booze IS NOT the Universal Equalizer. If you can't say it without liquid courage it need not be said.
Ladies; if you can entertain a Bachelor Party in your outfit choice; turn around and try again. A party is not always a time to party and you should dress appropriately, your job/reputation may count on it.
Men; Brand new 'Khakis', Dockers, Dickies or otherwise are NEVER appropriate as an option for a Holiday Party attire. Shoes, Belt and Socks should match..your uncle Artie from Boca should not be your stylist for the evening.
Acronyms to remember:
DUI: Its obvious but needs to be stated; avoid at ALL cost.
For Local (Greater Phoenix)Taxi, Limo and Desigated Driver Programs:
http://www.v1limo.com/designated-driver-services
http://phoenix.designateddriversinc.com/services.htm
http://callzingo.com/
www.topnotchtransportation.com/
http://www.viptran.com/
TUI: Texting Under the Influence is never a good idea (Especially if you are on the Sprint $69.99 unlimited plan).
CUI: Calling Under the Influence is only good when calling a cab.
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| RSUI |
RSUI: Random Sex Under the Influence can be the gift that keeps on giving. The Walk of Shame is never good, but having to relive it every time you walk by the mail room or copier is just a recipe for disaster.
LUI: Lecturing Under the Influence; Even if you hold multiple doctorates; the golden rule for parties, especially office parties is NO Politics (unless its the White House Party); NO Religion (unless its is Dali Lama) and No filibusting on any subject longer than 2 minutes.
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| PUI |
PUI: Presenting Under the Influence (Business Ideas, Peer Critiques and DEFINITELY Body Parts usually covered doing the normal course of the business day)
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| FIFO |
FIFO: First In First Out. Being the Life of the party doesn't mean you have to close out the party. Show some face time and make a graceful exit.
In a perfect world these would be Party themes would make for a GREAT Office Party:
- A Black Out Party; What you can't see won't hurt you.
- Survivor Island; Tribal Votes and Alliance, just like being at work.
- Music Chairs; Last man sitting takes it all.
- Truth or Dare; Waivers must be signed prior to participation giving full indemnification relating to any answers given or tasks performed.
- Dance Off By Department; my department is better than yours, again just like another day at the office, but set to cool music.
Must See Corporate/Office/Team Themed Movies/TV Shows that you can watch in leiu of attending your annual party:
- American Psycho
- Boiler Room
- Clerks
- Clockwatchers
- Fight Club
- Glengarry Glen Ross
- 9 to 5
- The Office (BBC Version)
- The Office (NBC Version)
- Office Space
- Star Trek (Movies/TV)
- Wall Street
- Working Girl
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